Trying to settle a dysregulated child is no easy task! Why is this? The part of the brain that controls emotions and control of impulses, the frontal lobe, is not yet fully developed. In fact, this part of the brain is the last to developed, which occurs in adulthood. Considering this, it is no surprise that young children can quickly experience heightened emotions or seem to act without thought. This is because the part of the brain that controls this is far from mature. So what does this mean for educators? 

First of all, we need to accept that children will have moments of heightened emotions, it's inevitable! However, with simple steps we can help shorten this heightened state, and enable the child to bounce back to their play or learning. So next time a child seems dysregulated try:

1. Naming their feelings: “I can see that you are (upset, mad, angry, sad)…”. This helps children feel noticed and understood. Using picture charts (like the above Kimochi chart) can support children in identifying their emotions. 

2. Then offer them some space to calm down. This might be a designated area in the playground or classroom. If they are hurting another student whilst upset, suggest that you can take them to a safe place. When working at a new center it might be worth asking if they have a designated ‘calm down space’. 

3. At the safe place, some children may like to be alone during this time, some may like you to sit with them whilst they calm down. Either way it is important to keep monitoring this child so you can support them when necessary. 

4. During their calm down time, try to talk about their interests or even read them a story. This will help to distract them from their deregulated feelings. 

5. Once the child is calm, now it’s a good time to talk about what made them upset, or their reactions to a situation. Once the child is calm, there is an excellent opportunity to discuss what they could do instead next time to keep safe and happy. 

Teaching children to name and work through their emotions is so critical for their development. Each time we reinforce positive behaviors and solutions, we are supporting them to create neural pathways that will support them to be emotionally stable in future. 

What other tips do you have to support regulating a dysregulated child. Share your tips in the comments below.